Values!

During the activity time don’t feel under pressure to ‘teach’. This is a space for people to encounter Jesus, not just to hear about him. It’s also an opportunity to learn. In the same way we might hear different perspectives on the Bible passage as part of our preparation, someone might come with their own thoughts on the message that we’ve never considered. And age isn’t an indicator of knowledge either: I’ve had some really profound conversations with young people sharing their thoughts. And if you’re busy, it’s a good idea to have a sign to help others with instructions and provide some ‘I wonder…’ prompts for discussion around the table. Did you know that we provide downloadable table signs when you buy Get Messy?

Obviously, the celebration time is a space where you can bring all the activities together and link them back to your Bible story or theme. It can be tempting, particularly if you have your activities, celebration and meal all in one space, to have team members busy tidying away during this time. However, that can be seen as giving permission for some well-intentioned adults to opt out of the celebration to help clear up. There will be members of the team that need to be in the kitchen if they’re involved in the meal preparation but it’s important for as many of the team to be involved in the celebration time as possible. They are not putting something on for others or performing at Messy Church. Messy Church is church and therefore they can come expecting to meet Jesus too! Just stick the Mission Impossible music on afterwards and challenge everyone to get involved in getting the room ready to eat together. You’ll find people very willing to muck in, particularly when there’s the promise of food on the way!

And finally, when you’ve completed your Messy cupboard Jenga, ask each other where you saw God at work in your Messy Church. You might be surprised by the fruit that simple question yields. A Messy Church leader shared with us the story of how a bit of feedback revealed that five different members of the team had conversations with five different families about baptism. As a result, they followed up and formed a Messy preparation group and have had several baptisms. It might be a quick chat over the washing up or you might like to check out the ‘Maturing Teams’ approach as part of ‘A Voyage of Discovery’ into deepening discipleship in Messy Church. One of the participants noted that as a result of their reflective practice ‘We have put Jesus into the middle so that rather than craft with a bit of Jesus, it has become more about Jesus with a bit of craft.’ Why not book onto one of our Messy Church Discipleship Masterclasses with expert practitioners involved in the research. New dates for the autumn term are coming soon!

Preparation: could you ask a family to prepare an activity? Or older folk in your sending church to help prepare craft? Check out this inspiring story from Chris Herbert at St. Mary Magdalene Messy Church in Campsall, Sheffield, and his ‘Crafty Cutters’.

Participation: how can we create a space where the different generations can connect with one another? You will notice in the brand new Get Messy volume 2 we have open ended ‘I wonder’ questions so that the power dynamic in the group is not weighted to adults.  The activities can also support non-verbal participation whether that be for very young children or those with special educational needs and disabilities (SEND). Trish Hahn is a member of our Specialist Support Team and has over 13 years of experience leading SEND Messy Church. You can watch Trish’s video on ‘How to welcome people with SEND’ and download her ‘Top Tips’ on the subject here.

Presentation: what does your Messy Church look like to those on the outside? We know that Messy Church is particularly successful in reaching families with primary aged children but if we don’t show teenagers or single adults in our advertising and social media, they won’t know it’s for them. Another of our ‘How to’ videos looks at advertising and includes some advice from a young person on how to promote your Messy Church to them specifically.

During the celebration time, who is leading up front?  Do you have a mix of generations e.g. adult with a teenager?

Appraising: invite people of all ages to give you feedback on what they like about Messy Church and how they would like it to develop. Chatting over the meal is a great time to do this or you could have a suggestions box available into which people can contribute ideas for Messy Church. If someone comes up with a great idea, why not invite them to be part of putting it into practice?

If you have young people (aged 10-17) involved in your Messy Church, did you know we have an online community that meets every other month? Although facilitated by us, it is organised and led by three young people who have a heart for encouraging and supporting others. The next gathering is on Monday 30 September at 6.00 pm BST. Please forward this link onto a parent/carer to complete the permission form and receive the Zoom details.

And if you’d like to immerse yourself in learning about building a fully inclusive worshipping community, then join us at next year’s Messy Church Conference, 20-22 June at High Leigh Conference Centre in Hertfordshire. Our theme for 2025 is ‘All Together’ and will be focussed on how we can welcome people of all ages, abilities and from all backgrounds to Messy Church. For further details and to book your place, click here. Discounted early bird tickets are available until 18 September!

We were also contacted by a number of people after the Queen died asking if they should cancel their Messy Church scheduled for that weekend. We like to think that as a committed Christian, the Queen would very much have wanted us to carry on! We advised people to go ahead but perhaps with some subtle changes to acknowledge her death and to be ready to support anyone for whom this might have been a trigger following any personal loss. We as a team were hosting a Messy Church Goes Wild event two days before the funeral and we incorporated an activity inviting people to pray for the Queen and King Charles.

The book Seriously Messy: Making space for families to talk together about death and life is a great resource to help you respond in such situations.

We also refer to the time of gathered worship, usually at the end of the Messy Church session, as the celebration. I remember Lucy telling me that someone had reflected on Messy Church and said, “but where’s the teaching?” to which she replied, “but look at all the learning!” Obviously, the whole session is worship but this time all together is where we hear about what has been experienced during the activity time, connect the activities to the Bible story being told, and share in a time of prayer and reflection. As with all other aspects of Messy Church, this time is for both adults and children to experience together. Unlike in other forms of gathered church, the children do not just perform before the ‘serious bit’ or during the singing. Every aspect of the celebration should encourage conversation and participation from all ages.

So, what about sung worship? Here are some ideas from the Messy Church Self Review Toolkit developed by Bristol Diocese,

• Small children probably can’t read song lyrics off a projector screen, and if they can, often songs run so fast that it is hard for their reading to keep up. Teach the song words or the chorus lyrics to everyone before you sing the song.
• Not everyone enjoys singing – try alternative ways of enabling people to engage with sung worship. (e.g. everyone closing eyes and listening to a recorded piece of worship music)
• Introduce songs that the children will know from their school assemblies or those that the adults will know from when they were at school.
• Buy some worship CDs to play in the background before, during or after the celebration and during the meal/refreshments.

If you’d like to learn more about using music in Messy Church, why not book your place at the Messy Church Conference next year! We’ll be joined by Sara and Sam Hargreaves from Engage Worship who will be leading two workshops on ‘Simple Singing’ and ‘Intergenerational Singing’. For further information and booking details, click here.

And so, we arrive at the meal table where there is more time and space to get to know our Messy friends. If you’re looking for conversation starters about the session itself, don’t forget our Get Messy! session resources include a mealtime card with three questions to discuss. It’s a good idea to make sure you have team members who can sit with any newcomers, particularly if they don’t appear to know anyone else. Make sure team members do eat! Not only does it show care for the team (they won’t have to cook when they get home!) but sharing Jesus might just come more naturally over the meal. It’s also important to take account of any allergies or special dietary requirements so that everyone can enjoy eating together.

The mealtime can also offer an opportunity to get the whole congregation operating like family together. Everyone’s eager to eat so use that to your advantage in getting folk to get tables setup ready, particularly if you’re using the same space as your activities and celebration. At my Messy Church the children are always at the front of the queue which means they have usually finished eating well before the adults. However, they really enjoy serving so they dish out the dessert to the adults before they sit down to eat theirs. Although I have noticed the portions start very small…!

Recently I visited another local Messy Church and as we were eating, I noticed a succession of older gentlemen arriving. It is a community space, so I had assumed they were arriving for another group in the evening. However, it turned out they were from the tidy church congregation and their contribution to Messy Church was to come and do the washing up!

If you’re looking for some advice on hospitality at the meal table, do check out our ‘How to feed your Messy Church’ video and download the ‘top tips’ PDF.